you do not exist forever

i am damned, condemned by my god to the hell that is my bed. condemned, bounded, by no one else but myself. does that make me god? all this power that i possess, i use to restrain. i watch the flies around me, begging me for something i cannot give them, begging me to die, but i haven't lost my ability to get up. for as long as i am capable, i cannot be dead, but the flies know i am waste.

i don't actually know how to feel, but i pretend i do, and how!